In the early morning of June 27 I started feeling strong cramps in my pelvis, reminiscent of period pains, but worse. It was around 3am and I got out my contraction timer. They were measuring 5-8 minutes apart! I was 39 weeks and 1 day. This was it, right? They were weak but unmistakable – unlike the random, isolated cramps I’d been feeling in the previous few weeks. I texted Garrett, who was working the night shift at the hospital, but he didn’t consider it a done deal yet.
I shouldn’t have, either.
They petered out after 12 hours, leaving me confused and dejected. I didn’t understand why and how that could happen, as I’d never heard of it before, even after 9 hours of birthing classes, many books, and reading weekly updates from 3 different pregnancy apps. I was unprepared for what it turns out is a common experience- false labor.
I had also been so scared of an induction, which my doctor had been talking about for a week already, saying she didn’t want me going much past my due date for the baby’s safety. I felt so much pressure to deliver and when I thought it was about to happen I was elated.
In all of the positive birthing videos that I had watched, stories that I had read, none of them ever involved induction. They had all gone into labor spontaneously, and that’s what I pictured for myself, too. I never considered the possibility that it wouldn’t happen, or that it would start and stop like it did. In hindsight there was important work being done, and it would all make perfect, beautiful sense later, but I just didn’t know it at the time.
I moped in the following days. I found message boards where women talked about similar “false labor” that lasted for weeks. I cried a lot at this prospect. I felt like I couldn’t trust my body. Then to top it off Garrett came down with COVID and had to isolate from me. I felt so alone.
In the following days I did acupuncture, got a massage, went on lots of walks, had a pedicure, bounced on my birthing ball, did yoga for engaging baby and inducing labor, and drank my red raspberry leaf tea, ever hopeful.
But my due date came and went.
Texts from well-meaning friends and family asking if I’d popped yet or had the baby only added to the pressure to just deliver already.
I’ve rarely been that emotionally volatile in my life but the hormones were taking me for a ride.
I’d also gone down so many rabbit holes reading about induction and it seemed people either…
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