‘It’s an endurance test’: Jayde Adams on what’s it’s really like to be a plus-size traveller

Full disclosure, I’m fat. Which means I don’t fit in. Sometimes it’s just a perception, but sometimes I literally mean: I do not fit.

Last weekend, I was sitting on the grass at Mighty Hoopla festival in south London. Beside me was a fairground ride that swings you up in the air. Like the helpful, big fat friend that I am, I was watching everyone’s bags, because I’m self aware enough to know that I’m not going to fit into the seats; once you’ve done the walk of shame from a ride like this once, you learn your lesson.

There was no back and forth, no one expressed surprise and implored that I would fit. I was just left with the designer bags, clearly trusted by people who had only just met me. It made me think more fat women should get into grand larceny.

I know that to some people, this – being left alone surrounded by strangers’ bags – might feel triggering. Not me – I love a sit down. I made a joke in my most recent tour (Men, I Can Save You) that so many women are marching for their rights, but I prefer the ones who glue themselves to stuff. Get me an old T-shirt, I’m coming for a sit down, Greta.

Of course, my nonchalant attitude to not being able to fit in has come from years of hard-earned experience. The recent article about Jaelynn Chaney, who is calling for larger seats on planes and a “customer-of-size policy” for airlines, got me thinking.

I used to be like her. When I see my old Facebook posts, the righteous indignation I used to feel when I was unable to fit into the Ryanair and easyJet seats comes flooding back.

I still love travelling. My star sign is Sagittarius, the most prolific explorer of the astrological chart – which is ironic considering I was called flat-footed and lazy during my stint on Strictly Come Dancing. As an adult, I’ve travelled the world; my best friend and I often say we’re on the eternal hunt for relaxation, and are globetrotting in an attempt to find it.

I’d post photographs on my Instagram of idyllic sunsets and swimming in blue water, photos of myself with my eyes shut in bamboo forests, yoga poses on deserted Mexican landscapes. What I never posted were photos of the flight; of me not being able to fit into aeroplane seats. I travel to relax, but sometimes by the time I’d reached my…